Unleashing the Inner Muse

Suffocate

Summary: Now even though I try to play it off.
I’m thinking ‘bout you all day long and
I can’t wait for shorty to come through…

She got me fiending for her love (can’t lie)
Man you should see how she got me
Spending all this time with her (with her)
I couldn’t leave her if I wanted to

Her love turns men into fools
Tell me what a man is to do…

A short love story based off the song entitled Suffocate by J.Holiday

Contains: Angst, Romance

~

– Flashback –

“I‘m fucking tired Justin! I love you so much but I can’t do this anymore! It hurts! You’re always gone. I thought I could deal with it but I can’t! God…” She screams – her beautiful browns red and puffy with tears streaming down her cheeks as she clutches unto her suite cases, getting ready to leave…

“Please don’t…don’t do this Shari. We’ll make this work just…please don’t go…I need you. I can’t fucking do this without you please.”

“We’ve tried Justin. It’s pointless…”

“No! It’s not, I love you. Doesn’t that count for anything anymore!? Fuck! You can’t leave. You can’t do this to me…to us. I’ll suffocate without you. Don’t you get it!? I need you to breathe…”

“I’m sorry. I can’t.” She whimpers, turning her back and swiftly walking right through those doors, her pace never once faltering as the door slams shut behind her.

– End of Flashback –

****

Now even though I try to play it off.
I’m thinking ‘bout you all day long and
I can’t wait for shorty to come through…

“God I’m pathetic…”

Wiping at my eyes, I moan displeasingly when I feel the moistness on my cheeks. I‘m in the same spot I’ve been since we landed and checked in here. I haven’t budged for the past one, two, three maybe four hours? I lost count. It’s getting dark out. I have a show to do tomorrow night. I have a busy day tomorrow. I should get some rest.

I haven’t slept in days.

I should sleep.

They’ve been trying to get me out of this mood.

By them I mean my family, friends, manager, bodyguards and even fans who’ve noticed there’s something wrong with me…

I’m pretending to be asleep right now in fact as I hear my bodyguard knocking on my suite’s door.

Tugging on my grey slacks and white t-shirt, I place the large flat screen television on mute.

I dim the yellow lights casting my vision to the wooden barrier, seeing his shadow under the crack of the door where the lights of the hallway are seeping in.

Then he groans.

A few seconds later he finally walks away and I release a plaintive sigh.

I guess he realized I’m not communicating tonight. Or maybe my faking worked.

I doubt it though…

“God Shari, look at what you’ve done to me. Look at what you’ve reduced me to.” I moan in a light whisper with my palms over my face and my body hunched over as I sit on my king-size bed.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. We were supposed to make it. She was supposed to be here with me. I wasn’t supposed to be here by myself. We weren’t supposed to let the pressure of our lives and careers tear us apart like this. I blame myself. It’s my fault. I didn’t blame her for being upset and calling me out on it. I practically neglected her and pushed my career first not even bothering to consider her feelings.

I basically pushed her aside.

But shit, I loved her. She had to have known that.

She had to have known I’d move heaven and earth to be with her. And I did. I did on so many occasions.

She, she was so different when we met over four years ago. She was my innocent, sweet Shari. She was my new wardrobe stylist for fuck’s sake.

She, she was so shy, so reserved and terrified every time I’d sprint off stage and bust through those curtains stripping down to my boxers for wardrobe change in the middle of a show or concert. At first, I thought she was partly retarded because she moved so fucking slow and I mean we were on crunch time. But, but then, it only took one time for me to study those grey encrusted bright brown eyes of hers and note the embarrassment in them. It only took one fucking time before I was pulled in. She turned the brightest shade of pink too when she blushed. It was cute. She was so cute.

I was smitten with her.

I think after that, I secretly enjoyed having those intermissions in my shows where I’d have to go through wardrobe change just to see her squirm. It was…it gave me this sense of gratification to know I affected her in that way yet she tried to hide it and play it off. I just…I fell. Somewhere along those lines of pointless conversations to ease the tension in the room between us and forcing her to go out and hang with me and the crew since she was sort of the outcast in the ‘tour family’, I fell. I fell head over heels in love with her and, and she fell too. I know she did.

But I couldn’t have her doing this job anymore. I had to let her go.

I mean shit, we tried at first. But, but there were so many times when I didn’t even want to leave that fucking changing room when I’d get back there.

She was just so goddamn addicting. I couldn’t keep my hands off her. I couldn’t stop kissing her or touching her.

I wanted to make love to her every fucking chance I could …and I did.

She was ruining me – in a good way – and I enjoyed it. I spoiled her and she did the same to me.

I was whipped. It was ridiculous. But, I needed to keep my career in check. So, we both agreed she’d leave her job.

She joked about me falling for my next wardrobe stylist. But, I took it serious. I hired a middle-aged maturing woman the next time around.

I did it for Shari, for me, for my…career… and to never miss my stage call again which happened so many times in the past with her.

I never guessed that her not being on tour with me anymore and returning home to LA to open her own fashion agency would put such a strain on our relationship. But, it did. It did and I made it worse.

I was always gone.

She knew what tour life was like and she respected it. That made me love her more. She knew what I was going through and she understood me in a way that no one else could.

But then, things got rough.

Things changed.

I, I was so engrossed in my superstardom. I was too engulfed with my celebrity lifestyle to see what neglecting her was doing. Even when I’d send for her, anxiously anticipating her arrival, it still wasn’t enough. I flew her out to be with me every chance I got but my mind was still somewhere else and not where it should’ve been.

But jesus my heart was with her. It was in the right place. It always was.

I guess when she couldn’t take in anymore she finally let me have it. Let me tell you I was not expecting it at all. She basically packed her shit and left after flying out here to visit me on tour once and I never saw or heard from her again after that…

I vowed I’d never return to this country because of it too.

I was crushed.

I was heartbroken.

But, I still loved her.

I was still in love with her.

Up to this very day my feelings haven’t changed.

But, here I am, in the same place I said I’d never be. It’s stupid really. How could I ban an entire country filled with so many of my loyal fans because of her?

I couldn’t.

That’s the painful truth in all of this.

I just, couldn’t give up everything I’ve worked so hard for.

Now, I’m wishing I did if it meant I’d still have her here with me.

Shit, I’m so fucked up right now.

Lifting my head, I take in my surroundings – large spacious room, velvet rugs, plush carpets, red pattered comforter, large screen television, walk-in wardrobe, dining area, living room area with cushiony couches, kitchen area decked out in marble designs, huge bathroom with sliding glass doors and a white tiled shower…

You know, it’s not even worth it without her here with me.

Diverting my vision out the window, I stare at the darkening sky, watching the bright lights of the city below.

France – A place filled with so much natural beauty and history.

Paris – It’s the city of lovers and for lovers.

I’ve taken her here with me on countless occasions.

We’ve gone on numerous dates, rendezvous and just any and everything we could do to spend time with each other and have our hearts filled with contentment.

I’ve, I’ve…god I’ve made love to her here in this city in countless hotel suites similar to this one…countless times.

“Shit…” I mutter.

And against my will, my mind drifts…

– Flashback –

From your lips and back up
To your eyes, my hands on your hips when we grind I’m fantasizing
Bout what I’m goin’ do to you.

“Oh my god Justin…”

I love the dulcet tones of her moans.

Whenever we’re connected like this in this state, in this mood, I love it.

It’s like we’re drowning in a sea of serenity, enthralled with the sync of our heavy breathing, body heat and rapid heartbeats.

“I love you Shari.” I whisper, my tone low, gruff and laced with lust.

“I love you to Just…so much.” She coos, lifting her palm to caress the side of my face.

She got me fiending for her love (can’t lie)
Man you should see how she got me
Spending all this time with her (with her)
I couldn’t leave her if I wanted to

Her love turns men into fools
Tell me what a man is to do.

Bending my head, I capture her caramel brown lips with mine in a heated kiss – our tongues tangling in a fleet of passion.

Breaking away I smile at her, my blues gazing into her browns as I pick up my pace, my thrusts slow and powerful as her hip movements match mine. Her slim legs are snuggly wrapped around my waist as she pushes back against the soft pillow, her eyes glossy and shining under the dim white lights.

Dear god she feels so fucking amazing. She’s seriously like a drug. Every single time I slide into her hot, wet, tight – so, so fucking tight – moistness, I lose all my common sense and connection to reality. I swear sex with her – making love to her – is that spellbinding.

It should seriously be illegal.

“Shit…baby…” She pants, puckering her lips as her slender arms wrap around my neck and her breath hitches in her throat. That is so fucking sexy.

“Damn Shari…” I growl, leaning down to capture one of her erect nipples into my mouth. Flicking my tongue over it, I suck on it lightly, hearing her gasp as she arches her back off the bed.

Tightening my grip around her waist, I pull her down underneath me to gain deeper access to her depths.

And it works.

I feel her shudder against me, her naked frame sliding against mine as our bodies are both covered in sweat.

She’s groping at my chest and abs now desperate for her release.

Breaking my suction on her mounds, I move my lips up her collar bone to her neck, kissing and nibbling until I feel her go rigid beneath me.

“Oh shit…” She screams, her walls constricting and relaxing around my hard, throbbing…

“Fuck!” I hiss, increasing my speed as I feel her walls stretching to compensate me. I continue pounding into her, continuously hitting her spot as my dick twitches with each movement I make.

Goddamn, she’s choking me. She’s fucking suffocating me! Her walls are practically milking my orgasm right out of my body.

“Holy shit.” I groan, resting our foreheads together, kissing her cute nose.

“You’re so amazing baby… ” I mutter, my voice fading off into a whisper, but I know she caught it.

Her eyes widen significantly and she instantly cups my cheeks with her palms, smiling that beautiful smile that I love so much.

Holding my breath, I look down at her, arching a brow when her lips form the phrase ‘so are you’ to me since her voice is lodged in her throat.

‘Cause I can’t breathe when you talk to me
I can’t breathe when you’re touching me
I suffocate when you’re away from me
So much love you take from me
I’m going out of my mind

I’m so close. We’re so fucking close.

I’m on the verge of exploding and by the high pitched moans Shari keeps eliciting, I’m pretty sure she’s right there with me on the same wave length.

“Look at me baby.” I order, slicking my fingers through her dark locks, watching as her eyes shoot open – her breaths now short and choppy.

Whenever we up in this bed and my fingers all in your hair,
I Wonder if you feel me watching you
Cause I can’t go a night without your lovin’…

“Don’t fight it.” I coo, squeezing her waist tightly, my thrusts short and forceful before I notice her eyes roll to the back of her head and she cries out my name, completely letting go.

Her body writhes and trembles beneath me as she inhales deeply, pushing me over the edge as well.

“Goddamn,” I heave as I cum suddenly and violently, my breath strangled as my face contorts in pleasure, relishing in the feel of the euphoric high we’re on.

Trying to control my intake of air, I hold Shari’s jerking body down with my hands, my own form slightly shaken up from the intensity of my orgasm.

“Shit…”

“Oh my god…” She finally finds her voice and I chuckle slightly, dropping my head to the crook of her neck and inhaling her familiar scent. “I wish this could last forever.” She whispers against my hair sending shivers through me and down my spine.

“Me too.” I reply, encircling my arms around her, never wanting to let her go as we slowly come down from our pleasurable bliss.

– End of Flashback –

“I need to fucking stop this. Shit!” I belt, grabbing a vase on the nightstand and hurling it with brute force and built up rage. I watch intently as it connects to the wall, shattering in the process. The water and roses spill unto the floor, staining the carpet and I just smirk, flopping down on my back as I stare at the ceiling.

“This can’t be healthy.” I mumble to myself, since I’m regrettably alone…again.

Jumping slightly in fright, I grip my chest when the silence in the room is interrupted with the shrilling sounds of the phone.

Gasping and trying to calm my nerves, my eyes dart over to the ringing device in disdain. If it’s not Shari calling – which I doubt it is – I don’t want to talk to any fucking body damn it.

Got me looking at this phone
Every time it rings I hope it’s you (girl)
Got me bracing for your love (and I’ve) fallen for you
I (can’t lie) I just want to be with you

When the fucking thing just won’t stop…

“God, just fucking stop ringing already! I don’t want to talk to anyone!” I scream out in frustration gripping at my short curls and pulling harshly.

Getting up, I hop off the bed, storming over to the phone.

In one swift motion, I yank it from its spot, watching as the wire roots out from the wall.

Yeah, the hotel is going to make me pay for that but I don’t give a shit.

Dropping the phone unto the floor, I kick it out of my sight for good measure before I amble out unto the balcony.

Shit I know it’s late. I’ve been awake for hours now not being able to knock out like I should.

And I refuse to take sleeping pills because I just can’t allow myself to stop thinking about her even though I know I shouldn’t.

Shivering as the cold wind hits me, I groan loudly, realizing I’m never going to get any sleep tonight.

Sighing, I pass my hands over my face trying to rid my thoughts of Shari. She’s not even here and she’s fucking killing me…

– Flashback –

“Justin what the hell?” She squeals with excitement, as I keep my palms over her eyes, dragging her along with me.

“Just trust me Shari.” I chuckle, as we make our way unto the deserted beach that I had set up for this special occasion.

“Oh my god, is that sand?” She shrieks when the grains tickle our toes, slipping into the open shoes we’re wearing.

“Uh huh.” I mutter.

“Ahh! What did you do Just?” She inquires skeptically but I don’t respond.

Instead, I remove my hands from her eyes and lean forward close enough to whisper ‘surprise’ before I see her eyes light up as she takes in the scenery in front of her.

Smiling with triumph, I dip my head back in laughter when she lets out a deafening scream, lunging into my arms to kiss me before she sprints off looking around and observing her surroundings. Stuffing my hands into my jeans pockets, I remain in my spot just observing her.

“You like it?” I ask and she shakes her head giddily. Shit, I’m surprised it didn’t fall right off her neck. “Relax girl. It’s no big deal.” I muse, laughing even harder when she shoots me a glare.

“A candle lit dinner on the beach under the full moon is no big deal Justin?” She asks incredulously. “Are you kidding me? I love it. God, I love you.” She coos, walking over to plant another kiss on my lips before she takes off again, dropping to her knees on the large blanket I spread over the sand.

She’s like a child on Christmas morning tugging at her blue floral dress to find a comfortable sitting position. It’s too adorable.

“I guess…” I shrug and she just smirks.

“Ok Mr. modest. You know you’re the shit.” She giggles and I chortle in response.

Yeah, I just love making her happy. With the blinding smile she has now, I know my effort was worth it.

I actually cooked for her. I’m still amazed by that. I hardly ever cook, much less doing it for someone else. I planned it perfect too. I had my mom take her out shopping for the day so I could arrange this. I needed to get the florist to set up the many rose assortments I wanted. I also had to order the wine, the scented candles and lighting. Plus, I needed to make sure I had the right mix tape of all the slow love songs I know she loves so much.

This is definitely an ending to an almost perfect day.

“Well don’t just stand here Justin. There’s a lot of food here. Come help me eat.” She coos, patting an empty spot on the large, soft red blanket for me.

Grinning, I kick off my shoes and plop down next to her, picking up some of the loose rose petals and placing them in her hair.

“Hey!” she laughs, smacking my hand away before I tackle her. “Justin! Stop! The food. We’re going to squish it.” She giggles as I tickle her sides lightly.

“No we’re not.” I laugh out.

“Yes, god I can’t believe you cooked.” She says stunned and I stop tickling her, pulling her against me to rest in my lap as her back rests against my chest.

Wrapping my hands around her waist, I rest my chin on her head, inhaling the scent of her hair.

“I did it for you. To make up for all the time we’re apart. I’m so sorry about that.” I whisper as I gaze out at the sea, listening to the crashing waves on the shore.

“I know. I still can’t believe you did though. You never cook. Not ever!”

“Well, I figured I could make an exception just this once.” I joke and she shrugs in my hold dismissing my statement as her breathing evens out.

“It’s beautiful out here.” She exhales and I nod in agreement.

“Yeah.” I reply, watching the glow of the ocean as it reflects the light of the moon. “Beautiful…” I mutter… “Just like you.”

“Whatever charmer.”

“I mean it Shari.”

“I know.” She sighs contently, turning around to face me. Her eyes look really amazing under the lighting – almost…hypnotizing.

Clearing my throat, I break our embrace, creating some distance between us. If we continue like this, I might just skip dinner and head straight to the love making but I’m hungry so…”So shall we dig in before the food gets cold?” I suggest watching as she perks up, grabbing the wine bottle and cork.

“Hell yes. I can’t wait to dig into your Lasagna!” She beams and I smile proudly in return, helping her to prepare our plates and drinks as I notice my bodyguards off in the distance patrolling.

Ok so, we’re not completely alone, but it definitely beats us being in two completely different states, even continents sometimes…

– End of Flashback –

And yes she got me there I said it
Somebody call the paramedics tell them to hurry up and come through.

Cause I can’t breathe (can’t breathe) when you talk to me
And I can’t breathe when you’re touching me (when you’re touching me)
I suffocate when you’re away from me
So much love you take from me
I’m going out of my mind

“I’ve had enough of this…” I snap, clearing my mind as I leave the balcony and reenter my suite. Taking one look around, I scowl.

Heading straight for the door, I swing it open and walk out into the hall locking eyes with one of my many bodyguards.

“Justin, what…”

“Don’t talk to me.” I hiss, fully agitated.

Sighing, he sits back down at his post still eyeing me. “You haven’t slept have you?” he asks and I shake my head ‘no.’ “You can’t keep doing this to yourself man. It’s not healthy.”

“Don’t you think I fucking know that!?” I yell despite myself. “Just leave me alone ok? I’m heading down to the bar; I’ll be up in a while.”

Before he can get a word in, I’m already halfway down the hallway heading straight for the elevators. I think he knows to just let me have my fucking space.

It’s late so, mostly everyone is turned in for the night in their respective suites. I shouldn’t have to worry about any lingering fans or anything.

Finally making it into the lobby, I walk straight past the receptionist who’s gawking at me.

Rounding the corner, I head into the practically empty restaurant heading straight for the bar. I notice that the chairs are turned over the tables and there’re only a few people lingering around. The bartender is cleaning up his station, fixing bottles and wiping counters…

“I need a drink man.” I voice, taking a seat at the bar.

“What you need?” He asks me in a thick French accent, leaning over the bar for my answer.

Shrugging, I scratch under my chin in thought. “Scotch on the rocks.” I state and he nods, moving away to prepare my drink.

Returning in no time flat, he places the glass in front of me and I stare intently at the dark substance. “Leave the bottle.” I mumble and he does just that, diverting his attention back to his cleaning or what the fuck ever.

Gripping the glass in my hands, I throw back the alcoholic substance, grimacing as it burns my throat in the process.

Quickly pouring myself another glass, I notice the shadow of another body taking a sit at the bar.

Rolling my eyes, I down the second glass, wiping at my mouth furiously.

Then I hear it.

That, that familiar voice that I’ve heard so many fucking times in my dreams…

“They weren’t kidding when they said you looked like shit.” The person voices and I nearly choke on my drink from shock.

Placing the glass and bottle down, my head snaps in their direction, my eyes widening in bewilderment.

“What?” I ask stupefied, still eyeing the person suspiciously.

“I tried calling you on my way here but…”

“Yeah, I think I destroyed the phone.” I smile sheepishly, glaring at the bottle of black label in awe. Well, there goes my sanity.

“Justin…” She sighs, placing her hands on my shoulder but I shrug them away.

“Don’t fucking touch me Shari.” I snap, standing abruptly. “Why the fuck are you here?” I hiss. Shit, it wasn’t supposed to be like this.

God, what am I doing? Why am I snapping at her like this? Jesus, she’s really fucking here isn’t she? What’s happening?

“Justin, they told me how broken up you’ve been lately and that your shows and everything is suffering because of it. No one could get through to you so they…”

“So they called you?!” I ask incredulously, cutting her off. “And who the fuck is they?”

Shit Justin, calm down. She doesn’t need this. But how the hell am I supposed to react? She just popped out of nowhere. When she doesn’t answer I narrow my eyes at her.

“It’s been almost a fucking year Shari!” I snap again, passing my hands through my short curls. Am I finally losing my right mind? I can’t be sure.

Inhaling deeply, she walks up to me and I tense under her stare. Her dark hair is shorter than I remember. It has gold streaks in it and she looks like she’s gained some weight in that little black dress she’s wearing. Shit, but she still looks so fucking beautiful.

And suddenly, I feel my resolve completely crack.

“Fuck.”

“It’s been the hardest time of my life.” She finally voices, lifting her palms to touch my cheek and my eyes instinctively shut on impact. “I just, god when I heard you were going through the same shit I was I knew maybe, just maybe I made a mistake. I mean, I knew I made that mistake the minute I walked out the door Justin. I was so angry and scared and I just, god I didn’t know what to do. I figured you’d get over it. I didn’t want to come back for you to reject me. I was so confused.” She whimpers and I open my eyes to glare at her noticing the unshed tears in her browns.

Inhaling sharply, I take a step away from her, my heart beating out of my chest.. “So it took you almost a year to fucking realize that? What if it was too late?”

“I thought it was. God, I thought it was Justin. And I was even more broken up because I thought I was so stupid. But you had to understand how I felt. You were never here. And I was ok with that. But when you were there, you still never had any time for me and it hurt Just. I guess when your mom called…”

“My mom.” I laugh bitterly. “I should have known.”

“Don’t get angry with her. It was my fault. I couldn’t put you through this anymore. I couldn’t put myself through this either. I knew, with the state they said you were in, you really loved me. So, I hopped on the next flight out here. I mean, they told me you might not do your show tomorrow night and I couldn’t let that happen. You have a duty to your fans Just…”

“God enough!” I scream. “I get it. I fucking get it ok? You just, you shouldn’t have left. You should have stayed…” What the fuck am I saying really? I still can’t even believe she’s here right now.

Don’t never leave me girl
I need you inside my world
I can’t go a day without you
And see nobody else would love but you I would never feel like I feel with you cause I…

“I know. And I’m sorry Justin. I’m human too. People make mistakes. I’m trying to make things right here please don’t, don’t push me away…”

She’s crying now and I suddenly feel terrible. Why do I feel terrible? She did this.

Ok, maybe we’re both to blame.

But this is some fucked up shit man.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I sigh loudly.

She always breaks me down. Even now, she has the same damn effect on me.

“Don’t cry Shari.” I whisper, closing the gap between us and wiping under her eyes with my fingertips. “Let me ask you one thing.” I begin, smiling as I gaze into her bright browns.

“What?” she whispers back, wrapping her arms around herself.

“Did you come back to stay, or to try talking to me because everyone around here is so worried about me?” I arch a brow at her, awaiting her response.

“Both, but more the first one.” She smiles shyly, bowing her head and fiddling with the handles of her side bag.

“Ok then.” I nod my head, gripping her hand and pulling her along with me out of the restaurant and into the lobby.

“Wait, that’s it?” She asks as I drag her along with me to the elevators.

“Pretty much.” I shrug, pressing the up button on the elevators.

“You mean you’re just going to drop everything that’s happened, everything that went on with us being apart in the last year and just, take me back no questions?”

Turning around to face her, I furrow my brows in curiosity. “Are you planning on leaving again?”

“No.”

“Didn’t you come here because you were worried and you wanted us to get back together?”

“Yes.”

“And, you wanted to know if I would forgive you?”

“Yes.”

“And you promise that you won’t pull another stunt like that again?” I can’t help but smile now because she’s smiling too. I’ve missed that.

“Of course. I promise.”

“Well then, I know all I need to know, and it’s forgiven and forgotten.” I voice as we step into the elevators.

“But what if I was married with a baby on the way or something?” She inquires, as I rest my back against the metal wall, pressing the button to my floor and watching as the doors to the elevator closes.

“Then you wouldn’t waste your time coming out here. And you’re not.” I state completely unaffected.

“But…”

“Are you?” I challenge, locking eyes with her.

“No…I haven’t been with anyone since I left.” She says with a hint of embarrassment.

“Neither have I.” I admit, grinning like an idiot.

“But, how do you know if I’m lying…”

Yeah, that’s Shari for you. She’s back…

Laughing, I shake my head sadly, pulling her along with me as the doors open.

Tightening my hold on her hand we amble down the hallway towards my suite. “You’re not.”

“But…”

“Are we going to do this all night?” I inquire, cutting her off.

“Justin, it can’t be that easy.” She says in frustration.

“Why not?” I ask, stopping in front of my suite. “I don’t care about what happened before Shari. You’re here now, so I’m willing to put everything behind us and work on this.” I voice feeling a little irritated but so fucking happy right now, I’m surprised I’m not smothering her.

“God, you’re still the same Justin. I’ve really missed you.” She coos, leaning up to kiss me sweetly on the lips. Wrapping my arms around her slender waist, I smile into the kiss, loving the feel of her soft lips against mine. Shit, I’ve really missed this…all of this.

Shit yeah, the addiction is still there.

“I’ve missed you too and I still love you. You’re still as beautiful as I remember too…” I mutter against her lips.

“I love you too Just. And you’re still cute as ever. You know it.” She echoes until we hear someone clear their throat behind us.

Breaking our lip-lock, we stare at my bodyguard who has the cheesiest grin on his face.

“Shari.” He grins.

“Mike.” She greets him, letting me go to give him a quick hug.

“I didn’t mean to interrupt…”

“No shit.” I interject but hold my tongue when Shari shoots me a glare.

Ignoring them, I swipe the card to unlock the door of my suite, swinging it open.

“Anyway Shari, you sort of left your luggage in the taxi and the driver wanted to know where you wanted it?”

“Send it to my room Mike and pay the man…” I interject again, folding my arms across my chest as I eye him and Shari.

“Justin don’t you think…”

“Ok, that will be all!” I cut him off, yanking Shari’s arm and pulling her into the suite with me, slamming the door shut in his face.

So, I’m a little anxious to get her alone. Can you really blame me here? It’s been way too damn long.

Inhaling sharply, I stare at her until we both bust out into laughter.

“That was mean Justin.” She giggles and I just shrug.

“Yeah well, he’ll get over it. I haven’t seen you in… forever Shari. Just let me get over the shock, because I’m not functioning properly right now. I think I’m moving on autopilot.” I joke.

“You seem fine to me. You know, I’ve really, really missed you Just.” She whimpers, walking up to me and pulling me into a hug.

Burying my face in the crook of her neck I nod in response. “I felt like I was fucking suffocating without you.” I divulge, feeling her shake in my hold.

“I know. I know I’m so sorry…”

“Hey it’s ok. Like I said, it’s forgiven and forgotten. You’re here now. We won’t make the same mistakes twice. I’m just so overly ecstatic, I don’t even know how to fucking act.”

“You’re hiding it pretty well.” She muses and I pull away to stare at her.

“You think so huh? Just wait till I wake up tomorrow morning and find you lying next to me only to find out I wasn’t dreaming. Then you’ll see how calm I am or hiding it.” I wiggle my brows at her and she busts into a fit of giggles.

“I have no doubt. But, the good thing is, you don’t have to worry because I’ll be here.” She says in a low seductive tone and goddamn, I can feel the shiver of excitement passing through me.

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” I chortle, scooping her up in my arms and carrying her over to the bed.

Plopping down with her, we start laughing again at our craziness, before I snake my arms around her waist, pulling her against my chest as I pass my hands through her hair.

“Welcolme to Paris, mon amour.” I coo, placing a light kiss on her forehead as she sighs in my hold, relaxing in our embrace.

And you know what? Despite everything that’s happened, I’m just glad she’s actually here with me.

Anything is possible in the land of lovers and Shari being here just proved that.

So, to make a long story short: If this is the end result, I wouldn’t have things any other way.

Can’t breathe when you’re touching me
I can’t breathe when you talk to me
I suffocate when you’re away from me
So much love you take from me
I’m going out of my mind (I’m going out of my mind)
I can’t breathe when you’re touching me ( I can’t breathe)
Suffocate when you’re away from me so much love you take from me.
I’m going out of my mind (I’m going out of my mind).
Ouhh no no .. I can’t breathe
Ouhh no no I can’t breathe ouhh no no I can’t breathe
Ouuhhhhhh woo ouhh

Ouhh no no I can’t breathe Ouhh no no I can’t breathe (I can’t breathe)

*The End*

****

Song credits: Suffocate by J.Holiday

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